Still Waiting!

Well, it's about 2:45am, and here I am - wide awake. Not even bothering to time the contractions - I've figured out that they're going to be WAY more painful than this when they're real. But, they do inhibit sleep nonetheless. Obviously, nothing worth watching is on TV at this hour and there's nothing going on on the computer. Judd has been asleep since about 10pm - even the dog has abandoned me and gone to bed. Can't say I blame them!

I'm so ready to meet her. Some days I'm way more anxious than others - but in general, I'm ready. As ready as I'm going to get, I guess. I WILL miss these little movements in my belly. I love trying to distinguish which body part that is sticking out. Judd finds it very odd now and doesn't really want to touch it when she does that! So it's kinda become our little thing together. Soon I'll have to share it with other people. Soon I'll be getting up in the middle of the night to feed her and change her and rock her. Soon I'll be even more sleep deprived than I am right now. But that's okay. Those are moments you don't get back. Those are moments you look back on wish you'd cherished a little more. Those are moments when their little independent hands don't push you back and say, "No Mommy, I do it." So I'm going to do my very best to cherish those moments!

They call what I'm going through "false labor" but let me tell you something...there is NOTHING false about what's going on! I prefer the term "prodromal labor" simply because it doesn't imply what I'm going through isn't real. Ha! Sunday will be 2 weeks of this prodromal labor. It's simply exhausting. I keep reminding myself that this is probably just good practice for later. And everyone else loves to remind me of that as well. "She'll come when she's ready." Oh that's a tough sentence to hear when you wake up with cramps and "false" contractions all night long for weeks. I stopped timing contractions a week ago. One night, they were 3-4 minutes apart for over an hour. I was sure it was it. Of course, obviously, it wasn't it. As soon as we threw the bags in the car the contractions started spacing out. I was so disappointed. I reminded myself that if my baby needed extra cooking time, I'd give her as much time as she wanted. However, I had no idea that this prodromal labor would continue for yet another week with no end in sight yet! Ah well. Not much I can do about it. I walk a lot but my hips and pelvis have begun getting very angry with me when I walk for long stretches.

The house is clean. The dishes are done. The laundry is finished. The thank you cards are mailed. The only thing I really need to do is go buy some groceries so we don't come home to an empty fridge. We have no food - and it's time I make the dreaded trip to buy groceries and stock up. I'm full term, ya know! So Caroline, you can come whenever you're ready!!!

I've decided to list some things I couldn't have lived without during this pregnancy, so I'll remember for my next one (if this one doesn't kill me first!)

1. Heating pad. This saved my back in 2nd tri and early 3rd tri. Surprisingly, my back feels way better now than it did back then!
2. Tylenol PM. I can count how many times I've taken it on one hand, but those times helped me through some AWFUL back pain and allowed me to rest.
3. Crackers. It hurt me to write that. "Eat a cracker" is a phrase I was SO tired of hearing by the end of 1st tri. But - it worked. When I wasn't feeling well, I would pull a cracker out of my purse and chow down. I instantly felt better!
4. Stretchy pants. I'm not talking about maternity jeans. I'm talking, loose, stretchy gaucho type pants. They're the only pants that I wore in 1st tri and can still wear in the end of 3rd tri. Mine are from Old Navy and I *LOVE* them.
5. Sonic Diet Cokes. Kiss my rear - they saved me. I had some really bad headaches in the beginning of 2nd tri and caffeine at least took the edge off of them. It was really just an added bonus if they were from Sonic because I could eat the ice afterwards. :)
6. Big panties. Yes, so embarassing. Not gonna elaborate - I'm sure you can figure it out. Big girl panties...that's all I'm saying.
7. Paper in my purse. I actually fanned myself in church with our checkbook the other day. Stupid me cleaned out my purse and left nothing to fan myself with. I fan myself everywhere I go because apparently, no one else likes their homes and buildings to be set to 66 degrees.
8. Pregnancy books. I read every book I could get my hands on. I really like to educate myself and jump into whatever is going on. Pregnancy was no different. Since it was all so new to me, I constantly had questions. The more books I read, the better I felt about what was going on. I especially like the books that go week by week to tell you what's going on with you and the baby. I LOVED knowing what Caroline was doing each week.
9. Flip flops. I couldn't put my foot into any other shoe right now if I HAD to. I started wearing my flip flops in April...I haven't seen any other kind of shoe on my foot since then. Ha!
10. A sweet, patient husband. Last on the list, but first if these were in order. Seriously - you would have to be patient to put up with a pregnant woman. We pregnant women are a special breed. Your husband's love really shows when you're pregnant. I didn't really start getting raging hormonal and emotional until about 2 weeks ago (hmm, right around the time the prodromal labor began..strange) and Judd has been really patient with me. I've cried A LOT in the last 2 weeks. Sometimes, he'll say, "What's wrong? Why are you crying?" and through my sobs, all I can say is, "I don't know!" So he just sits and lets me cry. He tells me it's okay if I need to cry. Thank you, Judd - you have been so patient with me...especially the last 2 weeks. I'm so sorry I've been such a pain. Your wife will be back soon! I know you miss her...but just remember you're enduring this for a good cause!

So there you go. My top 10 "couldn't do without" list for pregnancy. I bet I could add things to it, but those were the first 10 to jump out at me.

Well, it's now 3:15am and the contractions have subsided long enough that I could probably fall asleep again. Of course. So if you actually made it all the way through the ramblings - God bless you. :)

I also want to thank my Mom & Dad and Audra & Andrew (and Drew!) for surprising me on my birthday and coming to visit. I can't believe you made a 4 hour round trip drive to see me. You have no idea how much it lifted my spirits! I needed that. I felt so special. :) It was so great to have y'all here - especially since Judd had to work all day. You just don't know how much I appreciated it. I love you all so much! (And DON'T WORRY - I will call you when it's time. I don't want you to miss Caroline's arrival any more than you do! So stop worrying!) :) You guys are the best.